face the real truth
Self-deception – the biggest blunder that can afford people. Self-deception distorts your sense of reality and contributes to the creation of erroneous conclusions from the actual premises. Possible reasons for the illusions, there are many, ranging from the banal “I think that …” and ending with phrases in the style of “I love her.”
Let us approach the matter with a sober perspective. Consider the most frequent mistakes on the distortion of our reality.
1. Modeling of the false relation to the girl.
Explained. Met a girl and spent a day or two together, we have self-start the thought process aimed at this person. As an example, this process can result in pearls in the style of “She held it in my hand, so I told her likable, and she asked me!”. Here’s the first erroneous conclusions. You begin to build their attitude to this person, based on unconfirmed information. Accordingly, we obtain a fundamentally different development of relations – the method of “One swan cancer pike …”. This error is treated sober approach to the relationship by the method TOTE
2. Do the conclusions until the total amount of information.
An example of such an attitude to find it even easier: “She dresses well, then, it has a rich papa or a lover.” Thus, you make false conclusions from correct premises, in the end, breaking himself. This error is treated to good old method – the first 14 days of communication you do not draw any conclusions, just gathering information. Information can be recorded in a diary, for example. Conclusions can already then, after a critical stage of accumulation, and, preferably, after the confirmation of every fact. I know that sounds strange, but the probability of correct output increases by several tens of times.
3. You endure patterns of behavior of one person to another.
This is due to little experience communicating with people with experience that goes. This error is that you attribute to a new acquaintance habits (behaviors) of those with whom he knew before. Naturally, it is about such habits may not know. And do not be surprised then, if you say that the roses in her wild allergy, but in bed she prefers light masochism. It is treated as always – the new man approached with a clean slate.
4. You are not honest with himself.
Of course, you can spare himself and tell everybody that you love her. But is this really so? Maybe you just want sex? But, having formed his belief that (I love her), you begin to act on patterns of behavior that you have formed from reading books, conversations and other things, away, away. Although the patterns of speed seduction fundamentally different. So, putting himself in one frame, but seeking completely different purposes, you get? Right – two lines, which are called parallel. And if at the end of one of them is rough sex, it does not mean that you have you come to him on the second line. This error is treated honesty with himself – putting his real purpose, of their real desires, you’ll get them really.
5. “Luck – it is simply the result of very careful preparation”
Excess.
I understand that this problem is difficult to avoid, because its dimensions are cosmogonic sizes, but: YOU AND ONLY YOU, ARE RESPONSIBLE for what happens to you in your life.
Difficult, right? But the thing is that your world – a reflection of your attitude towards him. But if you believe in yourself and your world, your world, your card will be confident in you. You just need to learn responsibility, responsibility for everything. We must learn to be responsible for your words, you need to take responsibility for change in themselves, need to take responsibility for their communications, their actions, their thoughts. Everything in your life is because you are so let this happen. Now compare the line of conduct of the two types of people: “I wanted to, but: I tried, but it is: I’m almost done, but …” and “I wanted to and I tried, even if it is, I did despite”. You have complete freedom of choice – to take responsibility for their change and victory, or provide other this sweet fate.
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