A set of Jokes that you can use
A set of Jokes that you can use
A set of anecdotes, tuning in sexy and playful mood.
Two ladies play golf. One hits the ball and is horrified to see how he gets in one man from the company, playing nearby. The man grabs hold of the crotch, falls and begins with a groan rolling on the ground. The lady ran up to him:
(D) – Excuse me please, I accidentally!
(M) – Hichego, oh-oh-oh, now pass!
(D) – Let me help you!
(M) – Hichego, all right, oh-oh-oh-oh!
(D) – I am a doctor, I can help you!
Lady puts a man on his back, unbuttoned his fly, runs inside the arm and begins to massage.
(D) – Hu as better?
(M) – Oh-oh-oh, this is true is very nice, but my thumb still hurts terribly!
***
Ha street rain.
– Hu that we do VARIATIONS such weather?
– I have an idea – It govopit. – Get the coin and we sygpaem in opel opel or peshku.Esli fall – we will do what I want, but if peshka – what you want. Hachinay bposat coin, and I’m so temporarily ppigotovlyu bed …
***
There came as a woman MAGAZINE WORD to buy something for yourself. He sees – is man, and beside him a plate with the inscription: “Substitute men. And on the table are ppobirki with mosquitoes. She him to Problems of, say, what is it? He said that this – the newest patented spedstvo udovletvopeniya for women.
– How does it work? – Cppashivaet woman.
– And here ppidesh home pazdeneshsya, lie down on kpovat and released Komarov, and the rest he would do everything himself. If that is not so – here is my card, call.
There came, it means it home and did everything as said man. A Komarov ppobipki flew out and sat on the ceiling. In anger, the woman calls the specified nomep and said that his “spedstvo” does not work.
– Wait, now I will – responsible guy. Ppiezzhaet, looking at the ceiling and Komarov govopit, removing bpyuki:
– Last paz you zapaza, showing … :-))
***
Paris. 5 o’clock. Janitor sweeps the street: Vzhzhzhiiik-Vzhzhzhiiik, Vzhzhzhiiik-Vzhzhzhiiik (speak slowly). Then suddenly: Whack-Whack-Whack-Whack! (fast) opens a window, looks out the lady and said:
– Monsieur! You are confusing with the rhythm of the whole of Paris!
***
Loving couple went to the theater and asked the ticket collector’s box for two.
– Ho, she is very close to the screen, and you’ll see a little, – she replied.
– Hu, it is not so important – said the guy. A girlfriend, to somehow smooth over the awkwardness, she added:
– We go to movies to music.
***
– You have no predstavlyaesh, Claudia, yesterday in the film suddenly snapped tape, and in the hall for half an hour it was completely dark!
– That’s probably got a panic?
– Yes, when suddenly a light came …
***
Bay Dnieper. The young man recognized his love to his girlfriend, and then said.
– Of course, I do not like a girl too accessible, but do not forget, dear, that I hired a boat just for an hour.
***
Young man reproaches favorite:
– For many days I beg you for a kiss … The stone you, is it …
– And you got paralyzed?
***
– Poprobute just kiss me. I’m just behind …
– Scream?
– Closed his eyes.
***
– Do you kiss like crazy! – Exclaims partner, barely looking up from his girlfriend.
– Believe me, I tseluyus the first time – she assured.
– That’s what I am saying that you have to first pass a theoretical course. Then you knew how to do it!
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